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Only Massachusetts Folks Would Understand

Posted: 3/24/2014 12:14:14 PM
 
1. The Red Sox World Series win was, and will always be,one of the greatest moments in your life.

2. The guy driving in front of you is going 70 mph and youre swearing at him for going too slow.

3. When ordering a tonic,you mean a Coke.

4. You went to Canobie Lake Park or Water Country as a kid

5. You actually enjoy driving around rotaries.

6. You do not recognize the letter "R" as a part of the English language.

7. Your social security number starts with a 0

8. You can actually find your way around Boston.

9. You know what a "regular" coffee is.

10. You keep an ice scraper in your car year-round.

11. You can tell the difference between a Revere accent and a Dorchester accent.

12. Springfield is located "way out west."

13. You almost feel disappointed if someone doesnt flip you the bird when you cut them off or steal their parking space.

14. You know how to pronounce the names of towns like Worcester, Billerica, Gloucester, and Haverhill.

15. Anyone you dont know is a potential idiot until proven otherwise. (heheheh)

16. Paranoia sets in if you cant see a Dunkin Donuts or a CVS Pharmacy within eyeshot at all times.

17. You have driven to New Hampshire on a Sunday just to buy alcohol.

18. You know how to pronounce Yastrzemski.

19. You know theres a trophy at the end of the Bean Pot.

20. You order iced coffee in January

21. You know that the Purple Line will take you anywhere

22. You love scorpion bowls.

23. You know what they sell at a Packie.

24. Sorry Manny, but number 24 means DEWEY EVANS.

25. You know what First Night is.

26. You know at least one guy named Sean, Pat, Whitey, Red, Bud or Seamus.

27. McLobster = McCrap!

28. You know at least 2 cops in your town because they were your high school drinking buddies.

29. Sure there are 6 New England states, but Connecticut really doesnt count.

30. You intentionally give wrong directions to tourists, feel bad when they drive off, but then say to yourself ,"Ah, screw them." (hehehe)

31. You know at least one bar where you can get something to drink after last call.

32. Youre sick of the Kennedys, but you vote for them anyway.

33. You know holding onto the railing when riding the Green Line is not optional

34. The numbers 78 and 86 make you cringe.

35. Youve been to Goodtimes before

36. You think the rest of the country owes you for Thanksgiving and Independence Day. (...and they DO).

37. You have never been to "Cheers."

38. The words WICKED and GOOD go together.

39. Youve been to Fenway Park several times.

40. Youve gone to at least one party at U Mass.

41. You own a "Yankees Suck" shirt or hat.

42. You know what a Frappe is.

43. Youve been to Hempfest.

44. You know who Frank Averuch is.

45. ADVANCED: You know Frank Averuch was once Bozo the Clown

46. You can complete the following: "Lynn,Lynn......"

47. You get pissed off when a restaurant serves clam chowder, and it turns out to be friggin Snows.

48. You actually know how to merge from six lanes of traffic down to one.

49. The TV weatherman is damn good if hes right 25% of the time.

50. You never go to Cape Cod," you go "down the Cape".

51. You think that Roger Clemens and Johnny Damon are more evil than Whitey Bulger.

52. You know who Whitey Bulger is.

53. You went to the Swan Boats,House of Seven Gables, or Plymouth Plantation on a field trip in elementary school

54. Bobby Orr is loved as much as Larry Bird, Tom Brady, and Ted Williams.

55. You remember Major Mudd.

56. You know what candlepin bowling is.

57. You can drive to the mountains and the ocean all in one day.

58. You know Scollay Square once stood where Government Center is.

59. When you were a kid, Rex Trailer was the coolest guy around. Speaking of which...

60. You can still hum the song from the end of Boom Town

61. Calling Carrabbas an "Italian" restaurant is sacrilege.

62. You still have your old Flexible Flyer somewhere in your parents attic.

63. You know that the Mass Pike is some sort of strange weather dividing line.

64. The only time youve been on the Freedom Trail is when relatives are in town.

65. The Big Dig tunnel disaster wasnt really that much of a surprise.

66. You call guys youve just met "Chief" or "Boss."

67. 4:15pm and pitch black out means theres just 3 more shopping days until Christmas

68. You know more than one person with the last name Murphy

69. You refer to Savin Hill as "Stab n Kill."

70. Youve never eaten at Durgin Park, but recommend it to tourists.

71. You cant look at the zip code 02134 without singing it.

72. You voted for a Republican Mormon as Governor just to screw with the rest of the country.

73. 11 pm? Drunk? It means one thing: Kowloon!

74. 2 am? Drunk? It means one thing: Kellys Roast Beef!

75. 5 am? Drunk? It means one thing: You wish you had a blanket in your back seat

76. You know that P-Town isnt the name of a new rap group.

77. People you dont like are all "Bastids."

78. You took school or work off for the Patriots first Super Bowl Win Parade.

79. Youve called something "wicked pissa."

80. Youll always get razzed for Dukakis.

81. Saturday afternoons meant Creature Double Feature with Dale Dorman

82. Sunday mornings meant the Three Stooges on Channel 38

83. Youve slammed on your brakes to deter a tailgater.

84. No, you dont trust the Gortons Fisherman.

85. You know that Papa Ginos usually has a jukebox.

86. You think Aerosmith is the greatest rock band of all time.

87. Your town has at least 6 sub shops, and none of them are a Subway.

88. You know at least three Tonys, one Vinnie and a Frankie.

89. 20 degrees isnt that bad as long as there aint no wind- then it gets wicked cold.

90. You were very sad when saying goodbye to the Boston Garden.

91. Thanksgiving means family, turkey, High School football, and the long version of Alices Restaurant.

92. You know the guy who founded the Boston Pops was Athah Feedlah.

93. You know what the Combat Zone is.

94. You actually drive 45 minutes to New Hampshire to save $5 in sales tax

95. Youve pulled out of a side street and used your car to block oncoming traffic so you can make a left.

96. Youve bragged about the money youve saved at The Christmas Tree Shop.

97. Youve been to Hampton Beach on a Saturday night.

98. Playing street hockey was a daily after school ritual.

99. Hearing an old lady shout "Numbah 96 for Sioux City!" means its time for steak.

100. You remember Jordan Marsh, Filenes, Grants, Bradlees, Caldor, Zayres, or Ann & Hope.

101. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Massachusetts

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