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Things You’ll Never Hear A Woman Say...

Posted: 6/23/2009 12:00:00 AM
 
What do you mean today’s our anniversary?
I’ll swallow it all . . . I love the taste.
Can our relationship get a little more physical? I’m tired of being “just friends”.
The new girl in my office is a stripper…I invited her over for dinner on Friday.
Go ahead and leave the seat up, its easier for me to douche that way.
I wont even put my lips on that thing unless I get to swallow.
I’m bored. Let’s shave my pussy!
That was a great fart! Do another one!
God..if I don’t get to blow you soon, I swear I’m gonna bust!
I’ve decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.
Can we not talk to each other tonight?
I’d rather just watch TV.
Its way tooo biggg, thatll never fit in my tight.....
Ohh, this diamond ring is way too big!!
I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your ex-girlfriend has class.
And for our honeymoon we’re going fishing in Alaska!
Honey, does this outfit make my ass look too small?
Damnit, don’t stop for directions, I’m sure you’ll be able to figure out how to get there.
Is that phone for me? Tell those fuckers I’m not here.
That was fun! When will all of your friends be over to watch football again?
Honey, come here! Watch me do a Body Shot off of my hot friend Stephanie
I’m tired of cuddling!
You’re so sexy when you’re hungover.
I love it when you play golf on Sunday’s, I just wish you had time to play on Saturday too.
No, No, I’ll take the car to have the oil changed.
Your mother is way better than mine.
I don’t care if it is on sale, 300 dollars is too much for a designer dress.
Hey jew, pull my finger!
Would you like to watch me go down on my girlfriend?
I think hairy butts are really sexy.
Let’s subscribe to Hustler.
I’d rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.
Christ, not the fucking mall again, come on let’s go to that new strip joint!
Im wrong. You must be right again.


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